Stand Shoulder To Shoulder (E10/S2)

How to Help Hurting Men - Standing shoulder to shoulder.

Kevin DeKam, counselor and owner of West Michigan Wellness Group shares insights and tips in areas:

• Spotting men who may be hurting
• Things you can do or say
• Things you should avoid doing or saying

As a self-described "counselor for normal people" listen to his advice and learn a bit more about how to come alongside another person during a trying time in their life.  You may have to listen twice to catch all the wisdom shared in this podcast, and the good thing is you can do that if you wish!

Enjoy and we pray this helps you move toward healing in hurting relationships.

2 Corinthians 2:5-11  Bringing Reconciliation

"Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Do everything in love.."
1 Corinthians 16:13-14 ESV

Transcript

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Kevin DeKam, counselor and owner of West Michigan Wellness Group shares insights and tips in areas:

• Spotting men who may be hurting
• Things you can do or say
• Things you should avoid doing or saying

WMWG started out of a desire to be a resource for churches where they are not often prepared and equipped. A core passage they try to live out is 2 Corinthians 5:11-21  Bringing Reconciliation.

A primary thing counselors (and lay people) can offer is objectivity, which can serve or bless a person as much or more than one's expertise.

"No guy ever invited another guy over to look at his broken lawn mower to share with him how he feels about it"  Men  connect shoulder to shoulder, not nose to nose.  So spend time with others. Going deeper than the surface level "How are you doing?" can only be done in the context of a deeper relationships. Kevin shared how more and more people are utilizing the help found in counseling. Don't wait until "the house is on fire."

Tips of helpful things to do or say:

• Ask open ended questions.
• Don't ask a question, instead make an observation.
• Be patient, keep in contact and plant seeds.
• Be ready to listen
• Show up when someone is suffering, enter it with them, and just be with them.
• Don't try to fix it.

Things NOT to do or say: (especially early on in their healing process)

• React - just be with them
• Share your own similar experience, keep the focus on them
• Give Advice - almost never helpful

How to spot men who are hurting = Be Observant,  look for:

• their reaction is not equal to the stimulus
• withdrawn, pull back, not responding
• reaction that is inconsistent with your past experience with them

How to contact WEST MICHIGAN WELLNESS GROUP
     Phone: 616-600-1187
     Email:   info@westmichiganwellnessgroup.com
     Web:     www.westmichiganwellness.com

The purpose of our podcast is to help each other be better leaders, husbands and fathers for God's glory.
 
Our discussions are based on elements from the Men's Ministry at Hillcrest Christian Reformed Church in Hudsonville, MI. For more information about us, check our website and hillcrestcrc.org